Bell Ringer

November 23, 2021
Kate Joyner

In response to the times we find ourselves in, I have made up my mind. Please do not try and convince me otherwise, I’m afraid it’s too late.

If you want to find me, please DO NOT knock at my door, I won’t be in. Instead I’ll be hanging at the edge of the forest, ringing my bell, whilst I wail at the top of my lungs: ‘THERE IS ANOTHER WAY’, in an array of melodies, rhythms and tones. 

Some might call me crazy, others might not know how to approach a cry such as this one. Some may stand there frowning in disbelief, but this is beyond my concern now.

I will stand and ring until my bones want to fall into the ground, because I realise that I have been primed my whole life to take on a role such as this one. THRESHOLD USHER TO THE UNDERWORLD, DOORWOMAN TO THE DARK FOREST, PRIESTESS TO THE OTHER WORLD, BOUNCER TO THE RABBIT HOLE, call me as you like. You won’t find it on the occupation list anyway and besides, labels don’t match me well. 

There’s no place for a woman like me in the current order of things. I’ve decided that that‘s fine and I resign all belonging anyway. I hand over my passport as a citizen of fallen democracy because it is not my desire to live a ghastly ghostly existence.

I’ve come to dance with the trees, to sing the song of canyon wrens, to carry the scent of the long lost wolf in my hair. I’ve come to know the wild so deeply she has restored me to my original blueprint. I have drunk from her well so deeply, I’m drunk with the deepest kind of love. I’ve sourced the primal secret. Almost extinct, she has been. And in my intoxication I offer you the gift the knowing this love too. 

If you too are tired and perhaps feeling helpless then all you need to do is come find me, there on the edge of the forest. It would be my utmost pleasure to show you the way in. The path is made already. It has been made since the beginning of time, for a journey such as this one lives deep in the marrow of Earth’s song lines. You won’t be able to see it until disillusionment has had its way with you, which given where we are, should be any day now. Don’t worry, I am versed in the ways of break up, so when you arrive, wrung-out from the fleeing fight, there will be a hot steamy brew of heartbreak tea for you.

I know the way, but I won’t tell you the way, you have to find that for yourself. I will simply extend my pointy finger or whisper the wisdom of the wild on the wind from time to time, if you find yourself off track. 

If you do decide to come to the door and step your feeties onto the forest floor, I can assure you that somewhere you will go. But I can’t tell you where because that would be like telling you the plot to a play before you’ve seen it. No fun in that!! What lies in there is the secret, for you to discover. 

She wants to take you somewhere. Into the core of her where eventually after some trial and tribulations you will come to a well that is the source of all things. And when you drink from that well, well and truly, there will be no return for you either and you will find yourself taking on a strange dance whilst wearing the moss as sheer decoration.

And remember, wherever you find yourself reading this: IT’S NEVER TOO LATE TO REMEMBER…






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