July 6, 2022
Kate Joyner

LOVE, the thing we most long for; yet the thing that no-one has taught us anything about.

There seems to be a serious deprivation of what embodied true love actually looks like. I know myself, I have had to journey into the far recesses of time and space to retrieve something that seems all-but-forgotten from our current cultural paradigm.

There is a longing in my heart that has had its grip on me most of my life. This longing has sent me out far and wide to seek what I could find on this phenomenon of love. It’s a discovery that has unfolded over the best part of 25 years.

If I were to sum it up, I would say that to experience true love, we have to meet everything that is not-love. We have to unturn every stone that is obstructing us from love, which is here in every moment, should we choose to open, receive and allow it in. 

Love is our organic state. As humans indoctrinated by our modern culture, we have been divorced from this state which has left us in high states of trauma. In a traumatised, deregulated state, it’s nearly impossible to trust and be open enough to receive love, but if we are to remember and reclaim the very thing that makes life worth living, then we have to embark on this journey. 

We have to rewire our whole cosmology : from this trauma state which has us believing that we are not worthy of love, to knowing that we are deserving to receive. In our essence, we are the embodiment of love.

The thing that most people don’t teach about love is that it requires a shit-ton of shadow work and that meeting, loving and alchemizing the shadow is LOVE itself in action. When we hit a difficult patch, or some of our stuff comes up, we can think that there is something wrong. Wrong with us, with our partner, with the relationship. But the opposite is true. It means that you are growing into love by meeting all of the places that are out of love and letting love into those dark shadowy dungeons.

If you can love all of yourself, not just the pretty pieces but the stinky pieces, that is the true test of love. To love our human condition, our mistakes, our wounds, our shame and fear, means that we cultivate a love that isn’t dependent on conditions.

When you meet someone who loves from that place, you know about it. It’s a love that makes you feel safe, known and respected. 

This is the kind of love that will change the world.


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