Connection : Fulfilling the Longing to Feel Fully Alive

August 24, 2023
Kate Joyner

“It’s the experience of being in connection that fulfils the longing we have to feel fully alive.

An impaired capacity for connection to self and others, and the ensuing diminished aliveness, are the hidden dimensions that underlie most psychological and many physiological problems. 

Unfortunately, we are often unaware of the internal roadblocks that keep us from experiencing the connection and aliveness that we yearn for. 

These roadblocks develop in reaction to developmental and shock trauma and the related nervous system dysregulation, disruptions in attachment, and distortions in identity.”

 – Laurence Heller and Aline LaPierre

This is the opening paragraph of Heller and LaPierre’s book Healing Developmental Trauma and I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT. 

I believe the yearning to be in connection is the yearning at the core of each of our Souls. It’s our natural instinct to connect. It’s how we are hard-wired. 

NARM (the NeuroAffective Relational Model) speaks about environmental failures; and whilst the programming and conditioning we likely received growing up around connection is part of that failure, I believe the biggest relational failure is a symptom of OUR DISCONNECT FROM THE NATURAL WORLD.

Without this core fundamental connection to the Earth, the soul is severed from its true roots. When the soul is adrift, we assign connection to superficial things like: mobile phones, video games, and tv. 

The divorce from the natural world is the ultimate cause of our feeling of disconnect. This is a root chakra primordial reckoning. Without this connection, it’s difficult to have relationships that are filled with the ecstasy we yearn for.

To plug ourselves back into the matrix of Earth is to live fully alive. Earth is the source of ALL connection. 

May we remember.

May we reweave.

May we love from this source. 

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